#AskGaryVee Episode 72: Casey Neistat on Applying to College & How to Focus on Goals

– [Voiceover] Joe asks,
“What advice would you give “a high school senior in America “trying to decide
whether to go to college, “and if so, which one?” – Joe I’m gonna let
Casey answer this first, just cause I think it’d be fun to have you start off the show. – Yeah no, I’ve got a strong feeling about further education, which is that I think in life you should
only be doing two things ever, and one is like discovering
what your passion is, and then two is realizing it. So Joe, if you know what you want to do, and you’re convicted that’s
where you want to be in life, and that trajectory does not necessitate a college education, then skip it. Chances are you don’t
know what you want to do, otherwise you wouldn’t be
asking us this question, and if you don’t know what you want to do your responsibility is to figure that out, and college is one of the best places, one of the best atmospheres, environments you can be in to figure out
what your calling is in life, to figure out what your passion
is, what your purpose is. – Joe, I’m gonna jump in here, as the cars are racing outside, and say this, I agree with
a ton of what Casey said, I’ll also add that if you’re
taking $200,000 in debt to find your passion, that
might be a practical kind of, by the way, debt that you can’t even declare bankruptcy
against, which complete, I mean, I can’t even, I’m suffocated by the game, the AK racket
that is student loans, and today in today’s environment, things that you and I didn’t have. There are other places where
young people congregate, and pound into each
other in the serendipity of finding those mentors,
or contemporaries that allow people to discover. So look, I think one thing for sure, it’s fun, entrepreneur, I look at you as an entrepreneurial
artist, but I look at you way more artistic than I me. So, call it entrepreneur, artist, boy there’s a lot of
rationale in the 2015 world where college is not the right answer, and I think, you know what’s
really been unique to me, Joe, is I’m gonna give you a weird answer. I acctually find that there’s
an enormous amount of kids, and I’m spending a lot
of time on this topic since I was a shit student, and have made something of myself, that a lot of kids are still just going to college, just making that decision on not wanting to disappoint their
parents, and that to me is maybe the most
fascinating thing goin’ on is that father of five and a two year old living on the Upper East Side
with elite private schools where I’m paying college tuition
for kindergarten already, it’s been funny to me,
cause I’m really poking and prodding the parents that are my new contemporaries to
see how much pressure, and they have not switched yet. The reason I keep talking about college in a world where a lot of my
friends talk about its demise as more of a 20 year
thing than a 10 year thing is cause I still think
parents of my generation still value it too much
for their own self esteem. They want to say their
kids went to Stanford, and Harvard, and things of that nature. So look, you’ve got to
make your own decision, but I’m with you, like discovering it, and then I’d be curious, now
I’m like mixing up the show, what do you think about
this based on your answer. Because your answer is my answer, and there’s one other part
that I’m trying to figure out. I’m a big fan of practicality. I think you and I got lucky that not only were we able to figure out our passion, but we actually had some
level of talent within it. There’s a lot of people,
a lot of the people that go and try out for American Idol, or the wannabe NBA players. What’s your point of view on Joe figuring out his passion is to paint, but he sucks shit at it? – Well, you know, I think that anyone’s life, your world always shrinks and expands in proportion
to your willingness to take risk, or try new things. And that’s why I think that
like an academic environment is a great place for trying new things and experimenting with new things. So, if your passion is painting, and you’re a terrible painter, then maybe being in an
environment like college will open your eyes to
something like graphic design which doesn’t involve a paint brush, but you can make a great living at it, and you’re realizing an artistic passion that is certainly inline with painting. – Do you think that then one needs to be challenged to make sure they go into the funnel of college to recognize they’re not there to check those boxes? Because the way you play the game actually has as much to
do with the game, right. If you hack college in the way
that you’re talking about it, you know, now you’re
starting to think about, you know, course selection,
you’re talking about the kind of group of friends
that you’re spending time with. – Yeah, but I think college is, can be a total waste of time and money if not approached carefully,
and I think a lot of kids today go there for a lot of the wrong reasons like what you’re suggesting,
and certainly if there are better, other opportunities that feel better to you than college, I think now today, those
opportunities are… – Way more practical. – Are as practical as
an academic education. I can tell you that a big falsehood is that by going to college,
you will get something else. You will find success. And one thing that’s
becoming more and more true, especially as technology is opening up all new means of
transmission of information, is that if there were a
defined path to success, especially in any sort
of creative endeavor, everyone would just
follow that defined path. There is no defined path. And college can be a great way to help you find one of those paths, but it is certainly not the only way, and it’s certainly not a guarantee that you’ll find that trajectory. – Yep, let’s move on.

“on your goals, and separate yourself from “the demands of the external world?” – Andrzej, I’ll take this one first. You know, I don’t know what to tell you other than it’s unbelievable for me how much the external
world has not factored into my decision making,
I’ve talked about, if you’ve been watching
this show long enough that first F on a test in fourth grade and literally making that transition to I’m gonna fight the market, and I’ve been fighting
the market my whole life. I think for me, it was
the level of self esteem that my mom instilled
in me, plus some level of my own DNA, I think
that’s the friction at hand. Heck, a lot of the themes of
our last question were on this, right, like what does the
market want you to do, whether that’s your parents or society, versus what you want to do. For me, it has a lot to do
with intestinal fortitude. A Gorilla Monsoon WWF reference. You know, I think it’s
surrounding yourself with people that give you permission
to take that risk. That to me is the most practical version of what I’m giving you, other than you’ve got to be born with it. It’s finding those like minded people who are taking those similar risks, and give you, through their own actions, a little more umph, or
if you’re amazingly lucky to have that parental, or
mentor infrastructure above you that created that context. Case. – I think focus is everything. I think that you can do 10 things poorly, or one thing well, and saying, “No,” is something that I only
learned late in my career. – I still suck at it. I still suck at it right now. – Saying, “No,” is so
hard, but the truth is like we’re surrounded by leeches, blood suckers, and vampires,
and those are people that want to take, take, take,
and they don’t give back, and learning to say,
“No,” to those people, learning to say, “No,”
to all those distractions is the only way to get anywhere. Cause time is finite, life is short. Quickly you find things in life
that are really incredible, like family, things that you love, things that you’re passionate about that might distract you in a positive way from your career focus. So, you have to learn
to shed everything else. – I’m gonna throw a little
bit of a curve ball. I get so much happiness out
of doing things for people who would be, you know, categorized as the way you just broke it down because I have a weird gear inside of me that has zero expectation for the return on someone’s selfishness. I know that’s a little bit of a mouthful, but it’s just, it’s probably why I’m so ridiculously happy. I have such little
expectation for the return, it makes me happy to do the give, I sit in front of you
knowing I will accomplish less in my career, and amass less wealth, and a lot of other things,
less time with my family, which is my number one because
I get so much happiness out of some of those actions. So, I would tell you if you’re
in a rare group like myself, make sure you recognize,
in a world where people will tell you that you’re
a sucker for doing it, or things of that nature, you still got to make yourself happy,
but I will tell you, I’m way happier than I was five years ago because I have grown in
my no meter moving a ton. It hasn’t gone to zero,
and I think a lot of people close themselves out of serendipity by saying no too much, right,
and I think we’ve probably both benefited through
our years of the yes when it didn’t make sense on paper. But I’m with you man,
I mean I made a video a long time ago that, The Yes Virus. It’s like the sickness of just
saying, “Yes,” all the time, and it’s a tough one. – Yeah, I mean, I’ve made movies, I made a movie that’s Just Say Yes, like I believe in saying, “Yes,” I believe in embracing
risk, and embracing chance, and all the things that… – Do you think you need to say, “No,” more as you get older? – I just think it’s a learning curve, a very steep learning curve to understand when no is appropriate and
when yes is appropriate, and until you learn
that, you default to yes. – It’s a really, really, or no, my dad defaults to no. I think you and I, like
we have some similarities that makes, like I think
there’s a lot of people there that default to no, I think there’s a lot of people that default. My dad’s opening words are, “Hey dad.” “No.” Like I can’t, “I was gonna
say how was your day?” You know, like no is not a proper. Like, I know a lot of
people that default into no. I think we happen to be surrounded by a lot of people that default into yes. – Yeah, lucky us. – But I think, you know
it’ll be interesting, you know what actually, quick little side question of the day, give me are you a
default yes or no person? I’m just curious for my
own kind of like polling. India, move it along. – [Voiceover] CJ asks,
“How has having a family

– [Voiceover] CJ asks,
“How has having a family “changed your long term view of work? “And what does retirement mean to you?” – CJ asked a good question. I’ll let you go, cause I know you’re a new father of a second. – Yeah, so what does family
have to do with work? I think family is the ultimate cheat, and what I mean by that is I had a kid when I was 16, I’ve always had a family since I was an adult, my entire adult life I’ve had a family, and it gives you a reason
to do all this work, and that downtrodden feeling you can have, which is like, “Why am I doing this? “Why am working another night
til three in the morning?” When you have family, for
me, it gives me my purpose, my reason for doing
everything I do is my family. Part two retirement,
retirement’s my biggest fear. Retirement is what people
do when they wait to die. My grandmother was a tap dancer, and she had a tap dance school, and she taught tap everyday of her life, and she taught tap on a Friday, and she died on a Monday when she was 92. That’s my fantasy. I want to work until the last minute, I want to be working in my
hospital bed as I’m dying. So, that’s how I feel about retirement. – I’ll start with
retirement, I’m you know, in the complete same camp. You know, that is my nightmare. I want to die on Monday, on
the Monday that I’m working. I didn’t need those two days in between. You know, I’m with you
I think, you know look, I will say this, there’s one weird retirement fantasy I have, which is to be an old man sitting at the racetrack, having some nickname like one eyed Gary, and
like betting on the ponies. I do like the notion of
the ponies as an old man, so there’s a little bit of that. You know, the family, work
life balance whole thing I think is completely counter punching. Meaning, I hate giving an answer to this because I think it really is
predicated on your partner, and then the evolution of your kids. My partner part I really
kind of took care of. I mean, I was looking for Lizzie, when I found her, I locked her up, married her immediately, we were married within the year of meeting. I told her on our first date
that we were getting married. I knew that she was independent enough and could, I intuitively
felt that she could handle the insanity that is me. It’s crazy, I feel like
we’re still dating. Because you know I travel so much, and like I’m busy, but like
it’s just over communication. When I see a little
strain, I’ll cancel a trip, I won’t say yes, you know, I try to hack, the kids are a whole new variable. You know, now that
Misha’s five and a half, I’ve got to get ready for: They may not be like Lizzie. You know, my little Xander might want me at every single thing at every moment. So, I’m starting to get mentally prepared to counter punch their reality. Kids are always going to
want their parents around, but what’s the hack, right. Like, do I, like it’s
funny, I’ve been traveling, and where I speak now, I spoke in Anaheim and I noticed that Disneyland
was right next door, so I’m like, “Maybe I’ll do
these speaking engagements “cause I’ll take the kids,
let them see what dad does, “and then a full day of…” So, it’s interesting how my brain is starting to adjust to: What’s their reality gonna be like? So, my answer to your question is counter punching, what I mean by that is gross over communicating. Having those conversations
with your spouse or with your partner,
having those conversations maybe even at an early
age with your children. – [Voiceover] Shay asks,
“Think back to a time

“when you pissed someone off. “How badly did you piss them off, “and what did you do to make up for it?” – This is a really interesting question. – I work so hard not to piss people off. – Oh man, me too. I’m like suffocated by
pissing someone off. I’ll take this, pissing someone off. So look, I mean the only
time I’m truly ever affected, ever, by pissing someone off
is when I piss myself off. So, it’s a little bit
of a wrinkle, meaning I am so aggressive to try
not to piss off anyone, that the second I taste
in the water that I did I start hedging like a hog. You know, like I start like really, did you get that Sonic
Hedgehog, good alright, you got it (mumbles). I’m in full apology mode immediately. The only time I even am comfortable pissing people off is on stage when I’m challenging the audience to the quid pro quo, so I’m, on a one to one basis, I’m crippled by hurting someone’s
feelings, and the second that I sense it, I start backtracking. So, the way I answer, the way I fix it is by immediately taking
the gas off the pedal, cause I don’t like that feeling. I think there’s other ways
to manipulate my point. That’s the truth, I truly think that I can drive home my point
through honey, not vinegar. – Yeah, I agree, I mean
there’s no worse feeling than upsetting someone else. And that said, because I
have a very specific image in my mind when I think
of pissing someone off. But I can tell you that living life where you pander to other people to make sure you never have enemies or never have anyone dislike you is a very dangerous game to play, and I’ve always said with my work that I’d rather, if 100 people see a movie I make, I would rather have 50 people love and 50 people hate it than have 100 people go, “Eh.” So, it’s a fine line in that
idea of pissing someone off can mean so many different things. The last time somebody
walked away from me angry I honestly can’t remember,
but the last time I read the YouTube comments
on any one of my videos and they were 100% positive, well there was never that last time, cause I don’t think that’s ever happened. – Yeah, I mean, that just
made me think of Linkedin. Boy, does the conservative
business world hate where I’m coming from. You know, it’s funny,
I’m sure a lot of people are watching right now and saying, “What?” My living is being in the minority on my points of view, on the current state of marketing and all that stuff, but I’m with you, like on
a one to one basis, never. As little as possible, to
the masses, no problem. And I think that’s an interesting insight. – Yeah, I think so, cause as a human being the ambition is to never
piss someone else off, or to leave someone else upset, but as far as a belief system.
– For sure. – The belief system has
to be uniquely yours, even if that’s a divisive… – I will also say I’m in the sport sense, like in competition, I’m very interested in pissing people off. I’m, you know, it matters to me a lot, like nothing excites
me more than if I know somebody’s upset because
I did something positive for my team versus theirs. It’s extremely interesting
to me to piss people off during the heat of battle
because I want to get them emotional and off their game. – Yeah. – Yeah, alright, let’s move on. “a bionic body part, which
body part would it be,

– [Voiceover] Hamms
asks, “If you could have “a bionic body part, which
body part would it be, “and what powers would it have?” – The truth is I do
have a bionic body part. My right leg from the knee to the hip, and then the hip all the way in is made out of titanium. – I didn’t know that. – Yeah, most people don’t. And the super power that it gives me I think I can make this, but
when I was in the hospital, my leg broken in like,
literally, 27 places, and they were hammering
it back together made out of metal, the doctor said to me, “You know, you’ll never run again. “You’ll be able to like
catch up with a taxi cab, “but you will never run again.” And I was 26 years old,
and that is a tough thing for a 26 year old to
hear, especially someone as physical as I am. So, the superpower that it gave me was prior to that, prior to getting my bionic limb, I wasn’t much of an athlete or a runner, but since getting my metal leg, I’ve run 22 marathons, and
four IRONMAN Triathlons, and countless other races,
and I’m a much fitter, faster person since getting my bionic leg. So it has, I do have a bionic limb, and I do have a superpower. – I also have a bionic limb that no, no I don’t, I really wanted
one though, I’m pissed. – I was excited to hear what limb, what you were gonna go with. – You know what, I would go with ears. I’m not joking, I’m very intrigued by the notion of like, I
love picking up senses right, and for some reason, so one of the things that I think I do extremely well is I, that I really enjoy being able to do, and I’d love to do more of, which is why I’m going with ears, is I am often at a dinner table, or at a conference, having a conversation fully in it, and capable of listening
to the two or three other side conversations,
as a matter of fact, often when I talk to a small group of 40 or 50 people, I
will use side whispering of what I just said to
incorporate into my talk, and then look at the person,
and they’re always freaked out, because I was so focusing going here, but I heard them, and so I think people don’t listen enough. That’s
a big thesis of mine. It’s my overall social media thesis, and so I’m gonna go with ears. – I’m just picturing Gary
with gigantic, titanium